Comments on: An Adult Brother Sister Relationship

By: guineapig

guineapig — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 05:31:11 +0000

I have a brother 12 years my senior. We have not gotten along for several years. I haven’t seen him in a year or communicated with him or his family at all. I don’t exactly know why this happened, though I have an idea it was a dumb misunderstanding as usual. It hurts me terribly that he does not want me in his life. My kids miss their cousins and tomorrow being Thanksgiving my family is spending it at home without any extended family. Friends are all busy with their plans. My mom is spending it with my brother, as usual. I hate the whole situation, but he insults me, insults my family and he hasn’t made contact in one whole year. I am going to have to try to make it pleasant for my kids but it will be hard because I am broken-hearted that the only brother I have can’t even respect me enough to care about me.

By: ?

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:15:59 +0000

I have 2 brothers. One I see every week…I feel like hitting him every time he opens his stupid mouth. The other one I see maybe every couple months…sometimes I think it’s better that way.
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By: Decoy Duck

Decoy Duck — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:13:59 +0000

More common than you may think. I have an older brother who lives about an hour away from me and I haven’t seen him in a few years. Nothing is wrong, but that’s just the way it is. We e-mail often, but rarely speak. I also have a half brother that I do not speak to. I don’t tell many people, but he molested me when I was 8 yrs. old. His daughter is another I will not speak to… she was invited to live with me and my first husband when she came upon hard times. They proceeded to have an affair that everyone but me seem to be aware. My marriage ended and so did all communication with my niece.
Most people don’t have such unsavory reasons for not communicating; much is to do with an argument that hasn’t been resolved.
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By: Jen

Jen — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:11:59 +0000

It is probably more common than you think.
I am 32, my sister is 30. The only time we see each other or even talk to each other is if we both happen to be at our Mom’s house.

We never had a falling out or problem at all, we just don’t see each other as friends.

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By: Millenium

Millenium — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:09:59 +0000

I come from a family where there were five children; I was the "middle" child of the five. None of us were really close. I just lost my older sister and younger brother (both adults) last year to cancer. We were so far apart in our communication with one another, I didn’t even KNOW my older sister HAD cancer.

Even sadder than all of this, neither of my parents seemed to really care (that much) that they died. They sort of disliked having to financially help while my younger brother went through chemo.

Yeah! I think this sort of sad situation happens frequently. And that’s too bad. Because to ME, "life" IS about . . . . . .family!
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By: dukemack

dukemack — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:07:59 +0000

I last saw my older sister at my fathers funeral, before that 4 years. I missed her last (I think 3rd) wedding etc etc – Its not that we hate each other – just nothing in common and I in particular have no use for her. I’m close to other 2 siblings.
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By: Emily

Emily — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 17:05:59 +0000

I have only occasional contact with my older brother and I am the one who initiates it. If my brother would try more I would try more. But just because we don't talk much doesn't mean we don't care about each other, we just don't have much in common.
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By: tall model looking girl

tall model looking girl — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 12:03:50 +0000

Anyone have basically no relationship with their adult brother or sister?
I am close with my family but my husband really has no conversation or contact with some of his sisters. He sees them on Christmas but really just ignores them. He says it is their fault, I am sure others may disagree.

How common is this?